10% Happier with Dan Harris Folgen

What to do if you find yourself marooned at your Thanksgiving meal, facing a voluble uncle who is spewing political ideas you find abominable? Our guest today is overstuffed (see what I did there?) with practical ideas. I first met Bill Doherty several years ago, when I was doing a story for Nightline about a group called Braver Angels. The group was formed in the aftermath of the 2016 election, with the idea of bringing reds and blues together to create some mutual understanding and trust. As I watched the man moderating these seemingly incredibly successful discussions (ie no shouting, no rote recitations of slogans), I was really impressed. I later learned that he was both a marriage counselor and a meditator. So I invited him to come on the show. In this conversation, we discuss: why trying to change people’s minds or get them to abandon their core values is unlikely to be a winning strategy; the value of sticking with so-called “I” statements; and how to reach what he calls “accurate disagreement.” Please note: this interview was recorded before most of the tumultuous events of 2020, but it remains immovably relevant.  Where to find Bill Doherty online:  Website: https://braverangels.org Website: https://dohertyrelationshipinstitute.com Twitter: https://twitter.com/billdoherty Full Show Notes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/bill-doherty-301

It feels like the right time to drop a deep Dharma episode. And this one has a twist. Bonnie Duran is a professor in the Schools of Social Work and Public Health at the University of Washington, where she also directs the Center for Indigenous Health Research. She has spent decades studying and teaching Buddhist meditation, and also exploring the connections between the dharma and the indigenous wisdom of her forbears. In this conversation, we talk about: the connections between meditation and native ceremonies such as the sun dance; we explore a Buddhist list that I had never heard of, called the Seven Spokes of Sathipatthana; and she lays out a six word reflection for getting through crappy days. Where to find Bonnie Duran online:  Website: https://socialwork.uw.edu/faculty/professors/bonnie-duran Twitter: https://twitter.com/bonniemduran Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bonnie.duran Full Shownotes & Extra Resources: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/bonnie-duran-300

My guest today does a fantastic job of speaking in a not-at-all-annoying way about the inarguably important yet potentially very cheesy concept of self-love. Haemin Sunim is a Korean “mega monk” who has developed a massive online following and has written huge bestsellers. He’s also earned degrees from Berkeley, Harvard, and Princeton, and is the founder of South Korea’s School for Broken Hearts. In this conversation, we talk about how perfection resides only in your mind, how a celibate monk learned to give great relationship advice, and how he manages his own relationship to ambition. We also have a fascinating exchange about enlightenment. Where to find Haemin Sunim online: Website: https://www.haeminsunim.com/en Twitter: https://twitter.com/haeminsunim Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/haeminsunim/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/haemin_sunim/?hl=en Other Resources Mentioned: •   Love for Imperfect Things by Haemin Sunim - https://www.haeminsunim.com/books •   Haemin Sunim’s School for Broken Hearts - https://www.haeminsunim.com/school •   Song of Myself by Walt Whitman - https://poets.org/poem/song-myself-4 •   Ash Wednesday by T.S. Eliot - http://famouspoetsandpoems.com/poets/t__s__eliot/poems/15133 Additional Resources: •   Ten Percent Happier Live: https://tenpercent.com/live •   Coronavirus Sanity Guide: https://www.tenpercent.com/coronavirussanityguide •   Free App access for Frontline Workers: https://tenpercent.com/care Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/haemin-sunim-299